LOS ANGELES, CA

Frustration filled the air today after some dude stole a parking spot from California native, Dave Walsh, 31. Dave was on his way to his local Target for some “Q-Tips and South Park Season 7” when he ran into some difficulties whilst trying to park his 1996 Honda Accord. “It was really hot today and I didn’t want to have to park in the very end of the row, so I drove around for a while with the air conditioner on and waited for a spot close up front to open up.” Walsh said. Allegedly, he was driving around the Target lot for more than 20 minutes when he finally spotted a family packing up the trunk of thier car and getting ready to leave its designated parking area. “I was so excited, I stopped as soon as I saw the bags being loaded into the car and proceeded to turn my blinker on” explained Walsh. Minutes later, the humiliation occured.

Witnesses Javier and Marisol Lopez were heading into the retailer when they stopped to observe the scene. “This guy was like, waiting for another car to back up but it looked like it was going to take forever, man. The family had like, seven ninos standing around and they all looked like they weren’t in no hurry.” Javier claimed. The family loaded thier shopping bags into the mid-size Camry and then started piling themselves into the car. “They loaded the last kid onto someone’s lap in the back seat and closed the door, and then this fool right here started slowly coming up the row in the opposite direction. Man, that guy had no idea what was going down.” Marisol stated.

According to Walsh, he saw what he described as “a big, lifted Bro truck” turn the corner into the row and slowly start creeping towards him. “I didn’t think anything of it at first, I just figured he was going to pass me by.” As the Camry backed out of the parking spot, eyewitnesses saw Walsh slowly start to make his turn into the space when all of a sudden, a large black truck cut out in front of him and squeezed into the parking spot. “He didn’t even look like he knew what happened to him,” one Target patron claimed,”it was over and done before he even started to pull into that spot.”

Exiting the truck were two unidentified young men who yelled “Finders, keepers!” at Walsh and slapped a hand on the hood of his car before heading into Target. Walsh claimed he was embarrassed and frustrated with the events that occured. “I had my blinker on and that meant that this spot was mine!” Walsh slowly drove away from the scene when he saw another car backing out of its spot which was even closer to the one he waited for but he had already “come too far”. “I thought about doing a Fried Green Tomatos and just pulling into the spot anyway but the deductible on my insurance policy is $1000 bucks.” Walsh finally settled on parking at the end of the row and walking to Target which he described as “uncomfortable” and “very inconvienent”. When asked if Walsh was planning revenge on the parking spot-stealer he refused to comment but was later seen by eyewitnesses in the parking lot heading towards the black truck with an unidentified food condiment in hand.